Girlfriend 7.0 to Wife 1.0 ???

Discussion in 'The Lounge' started by Mrs. Bipolar, Feb 3, 2006.

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  1. Mrs. Bipolar

    Mrs. Bipolar Football Widow

    Subject: FW: Tech Support

    Dear Tech Support:

    Last year I upgraded from Girlfriend 7.0 to Wife 1.0. I soon noticed that the new program began unexpected child processing that took up a lot of space and valuable resources. In addition, Wife 1.0 installed itself into all other programs and now monitors all other system activity. Applications such as Poker Night 10.3, Football 5.0 , Hunting and Fishing 7.5, and Racing 3.6.

    I can't seem to keep Wife 1.0 in the background! while attempting to run my favorite applications. I'm thinking about going back to Girlfriend 7.0 , but the uninstall doesn't work on Wife 1.0. Please help!


    A Troubled User. (KEEP READING) ___________________________________

    Dear Troubled User:

    This is a very common problem that men complain about.

    Many people upgrade from Girlfriend 7.0 to Wife 1.0, thinking that it is just a Utilities and Entertainment program. Wife 1.0 is an OPERATING SYSTEM and is designed by its Creator to run EVERYTHING!!! It is also impossible to delete Wife 1.0 and to return to Girlfriend 7.0. It is impossible to uninstall, or purge the program files from the system once installed.

    You cannot go back to Girlfriend 7.0 because Wife 1.0 is designed to not allow this. Look in your Wife 1.0 manual under Warnings-Alimony-Child Support. I recommend that you keep Wife1.0 and work on improving the situation. I suggest installing the background application "Yes Dear" to alleviate software augmentation.

    The best course of action is to enter the command C:\APOLOGIZE because ultimately you will have to give the APOLOGIZE command before the system will return to normal anyway.

    Wife 1.0 is a great program, but it tends to be very high maintenance. Wife 1.0 comes with several support programs, such as Clean and Sweep 3.0 , Cook It 1.5 and Do Bills 4.2.

    However, be very careful how you use these programs . Improper use will cause the system to launch the program Nag Nag 9.5 . Once this happens, the only way to improve the performance of Wife 1.0 is to purchase additional software. I recommend Flowers 2.1 and Diamonds 5.0 !

    WARNING!!! DO NOT , under any circumstances, install Secretary With Short Skirt 3.3. This application is not supported by Wife 1.0 and will cause irreversible damage to the operating system.

    Best of luck,
    Tech Support
  2. maximus

    maximus Starter

    Im 18(19 in April) and still working on Girlfriend 1.0
  3. KamikaZ

    KamikaZ Ex-Hall of Famer

    Ouch ^^

    That was somewhat humorous. Hopefully I won't get Wife 1.0 before I go through Girlfriend 105.0

  4. maximus

    maximus Starter

    Now that would suck, what version Girlfriend are you on now
  5. KamikaZ

    KamikaZ Ex-Hall of Famer

    I dunno, way past version 7.0 :ha:
  6. avvie

    avvie It's another cold day in Hell Tip Jar Donor

    I failed to use the update manager and my version uninstalled itself.
  7. Vigsted

    Vigsted Starter

    I heard there's a removal tool available for Wife 1.0 out there called Divorce 0.9b, however it incurs a 50% data loss...
  8. KamikaZ

    KamikaZ Ex-Hall of Famer

    Unless you were smart and downloaded the patch called Prenup 1.5...
  9. GoT

    GoT Strength and Honor Tip Jar Donor

    The only reason to install the Prenup patch at all is for those lucky few who have Assetts41 Overflow issues. And if any version of Girlfriend runs the Golddigger subroutine for Assetts41 Overflow then getting Wife1.0 to install with any version of Prenup is impossible
  10. PhiSlammaJamma

    PhiSlammaJamma Critical Possession

    Wife 1.0 comes with spyware. So don't even think about surfing for girlfriend 7.0.
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