goTitans.com Update Thread v2

Discussion in 'The Lounge' started by TitanJeff, Jan 17, 2018.

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  1. VondyP

    VondyP Undisputed 2QBeaver Champion

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    xo isnt giving up his cushy job, he loves it, he only has to work slightly more than jcb
     
  2. XO

    XO Nevada Native

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    So fun story time.

    Tuesday I was driving home from work and happened to drive the van that day.

    On the way home the temp light dings and comes one. Temp rising. I stop and get out. Antifreeze pouring out of the engine. Hose popped from the radiator. Had to call a tow.

    Now before leaving my office I had a slight urge to poo. Like a 3/10, mild, I can make it home easily.

    I had to stop the van in a neighborhood I was cutting through to avoid traffic. I call a tow and it will be 45 mins before they show up. Sucks.

    It's also building up a storm outside, starting to sprinkle and it's hot af like June in Alabama.

    About the time the van stopped my 3/10 poo urge jumped to a solid 5/10.

    About 15 mins pass and the tow company calls me back and says he's stuck in traffic. It will be a bit longer, 7/10 now. I'm uncomfortable.

    About that time a guy comes out of his house and asks if I need any help, I'm like "no but thanks, a tow is on the way". He says if it starts to rain feel free to come up on the porch. I'm like thanks, he offers me a water and goes back inside.

    8/10

    I'm wondering what's going to happen. Do I try to find a bush in this neighborhood? Do I get in the van and **** in a bag? I can tell it's going to be violent.

    The tow truck is still probably 30 mins away, plus loading, plus the ride back to the shop to leave it, then finding a bathroom. I'm in serious trouble.

    I'm sweating, I'm in pain. It is starting to push on the backdoor. I'm going to **** my pants waiting on a tow truck. Then I'm going to have to ride in the tow truck with ****** pants. My wife is at work. Nobody is close by to help.

    9/10

    I am straining with everything I have to keep my ass hole shut.

    Random guy exits his house again. Small talk.

    I have to be in visible pain at this point. Pouring sweat. A violent monster is trying to tear its way out of my butt.

    Random asks if I need anything again.

    I hit 10/10 I'm about to immediately vacate my bowels in this man's driveway.

    "Can I please use your bathroom?"

    He says sure come on in.

    I hit 10/10

    I'm getting dizzy, field of vision is shrinking.

    I get up his stairs and he says second door on the left or was it right? I can't tell, I'm in insane pain, now I'm about to **** in this man's floor.

    The hallway is dark, I can't see.

    He hits the hall light I see the bathroom door and dash inside shutting it quickly. I pray he isn't outside the door.

    I barely get my pants over the curvature of my ass cheeks before the first turds start flying out. They're hitting water as my butt sits down.

    It smells rancid. I immediately flush and turn on the sink faucet. It keeps coming. I flush once more. Finally I empty out and wipe up.

    I was in and out in three mins. It smells like someone microwaved dog ****.

    He's in the other room watching TV, thank god.

    We go back outside. More small talk. He tells me he's blind in his right eye because he crashed a dirt bike through a window ten years ago. Cool man.

    Tow truck pulls up. He stands outside while they load the van. Goes back in as we pull off.

    I say a silent prayer that the smell was gone by time he went in.

    Never going home that way again.
     
    #462 XO, Jun 13, 2019
    Last edited by a moderator: Jun 14, 2019
    • LOL LOL x 3
    • High Five High Five x 1
  3. RTH

    RTH Meh...

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    Visual reenactment

     
    #463 RTH, Jun 13, 2019
    Last edited by a moderator: Jun 14, 2019
    • Hit the Target Hit the Target x 1
  4. TitanJeff

    TitanJeff Kahuna Grande Staff

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    The reason it took so long.

    slow-boat.jpg
     
    • LOL LOL x 4
  5. The Hammer

    The Hammer Ace Degenerate

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    hey back up now though, thank you

    [​IMG]
     
  6. XO

    XO Nevada Native

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    wE dOnT dO tHaT

    [​IMG]
     
    • LOL LOL x 1
  7. The Hammer

    The Hammer Ace Degenerate

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    lol

    First time for everything

    ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
     
  8. XO

    XO Nevada Native

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    His hoodie is fire af.

    I want it, the purple with original logo
     
    • High Five High Five x 1
  9. VondyP

    VondyP Undisputed 2QBeaver Champion

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    Traitor
     
  10. XO

    XO Nevada Native

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    I was an OG raptors fan, early 90's

    Grizzlies stole me away though
     
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