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Report: Tom Brady Breaks Up With His Goat

Discussion in 'Smack Central' started by SEC 330 BIPOLAR, Jan 20, 2007.

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  1. SEC 330 BIPOLAR jive turkey

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    New England Patriots quarterback Tom Brady is reportedly dealing with some personal issues just days before his team is scheduled to clash with the Indianapolis Colts for the AFC Championship. According to numerous sources including the quarterback himself, the dreamy star has split with Mr. Nibbles – the white billy goat with whom he has been linked since the two appeared together in a steamy GQ photo spread in the summer of 2005.

    “It’s true. Tom and Mr. Nibbles have gone their separate ways. But it was an amicable split and they hope to remain friends,” said Donald Yee, Brady’s agent. “I ask that everyone respect Tom’s privacy as he goes through this difficult time.”

    The relationship between the New England signal caller and the domesticated goat exploded two summers ago when the two hit it off during the GQ shoot. Brady, shot in various stages of undress, was given numerous animals to hold but felt an immediate connection to Mr. Nibbles when he was handed the ten four-month-old, downy soft goat.

    “Tom called me right when the shoot was over,” recalled teammate Tedy Bruschi in an old interview. “Right when I picked up he said: ‘Tedy, I’m in love.’ I congratulated him and asked him who the lucky lady was. He then explained that he wasn’t sure if it was a boy or girl, which I found surprising, and then he also told me that it wasn’t even a person, but a little baby goat – which I found even more surprising. But he’s my friend and my teammate, so I have to support him, even if he does decide to date a goat.”

    Looking back to when the torrid man-goat affair began, Bruschi says he saw signs early on that the match might not last.

    “I don’t know exactly what it was. It was just a general feeling that I had,” says Bruschi. “Maybe it was because Mr. Nibbles was a goat and Tom is a human. But mainly it was that they didn’t seem to have much in common.”

    Others with knowledge of the relationship say Mr. Nibbles would often go extended periods of time without speaking to Brady, and would often display destructive tendencies – chewing through canned goods and furniture and defecating on the floor of Brady’s luxury Boston apartment.

    “I think Mr. Nibbles was using Tom as a meal ticket,” says Patriots wide receiver Troy Brown. “And I mean, literally. He didn’t eat if Tom didn’t feed him. You know, since he’s a goat.”

    Brady says, though, that Mr. Nibbles is not to blame for the break-up. The lovely super model Gisele Bundchen is now on all fours calling Tom “DAAAADDYY”.

    “We had a good run and I’ll think fondly of him forever,” said Brady. “We had some great times – like when we first met on that photo shoot and when we went on vacation to the Irish countryside last summer – and some bad times, too, like the first time I had to rush him to the hospital for severe anal bleeding and hemorrhaging. But I just don’t want to be tied down right now. I’m a young, busy guy and I make a comfortable living. I’ve done the goat thing. Now I want to explore what else is out there.”

    special thanks to Coltfreaks.com mod and goTitans.com member smitty46953
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  2. Smitty46953 Starter

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    Glad ya liked it BIP !!!:grrhee:
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